Babyeyi mube abungeri b’abana banyu
“Ukwiriye kumenya neza uko umukumbi wawe umeze.”—IMIG 27:23.
1, 2. (a) Vuga zimwe mu nshingano umwungeri w’Umwisirayeli yari afite. (b) Ni mu buhe buryo ababyeyi bameze nk’abungeri?
ABUNGERI bo muri Isirayeli ya kera bagiraga ubuzima bugoye. Ntibicwaga n’izuba n’ubukonje gusa, ahubwo nanone babaga bagomba kurinda imikumbi yabo inyamaswa z’inkazi n’abajura. Abungeri bagenzuraga intama zabo buri gihe maze bakavura izirwaye cyangwa izakomeretse. Bitaga mu buryo bwihariye ku bana b’intama kubera ko babaga badafite imbaraga nk’iz’intama zikuze.—Intang 33:13.
2 Mu buryo runaka, ababyeyi b’Abakristo bameze nk’abungeri, kuko basabwa kugaragaza imico nk’iyabo. Bafite inshingano yo kurera abana babo ‘babahana nk’uko Yehova ashaka, kandi babatoza kugira imitekerereze nk’iye’ (Efe 6:4). Ese iyo ni inshingano yoroshye? Oya rwose. Buri gihe abana baba bugarijwe na poropagande za Satani, hamwe na kamere yabo ibogamira ku cyaha (2 Tim 2:22; 1 Yoh 2:16). None se niba ufite abana, wabafasha ute? Reka dusuzume ibintu bitatu wakora kugira ngo ube umwungeri w’abana bawe, ni ukuvuga kubamenya, kubagaburira no kubayobora.
MENYA ABANA BAWE
3. Ababyeyi bakora iki kugira ngo ‘bamenye neza’ abana babo?
3 Umwungeri mwiza asuzuma neza buri ntama kugira ngo Imig 27:23). Kugira ngo ubigereho, ugomba kumenya ibyo abana bawe bakora, ibyo batekereza n’uko biyumva. Wabigeraho ute? Bumwe mu buryo bwiza bwo kubigeraho ni ukuganira na bo buri gihe.
amenye niba ifite amagara mazima. Mu buryo bw’ikigereranyo, uko ni ko nawe ugomba kubigenza ku birebana n’abana bawe. Bibiliya igira iti ‘menya neza uko umukumbi wawe umeze’ (4, 5. (a) Ni iki ababyeyi bakora kugira ngo abana babo bababwire icyo batekereza? (Reba ifoto ibimburira iki gice.) (b) Ni iki wakoze kugira ngo abana bawe bakubwire icyo batekereza?
4 Ababyeyi bamwe babonye ko gushyikirana n’abana babo birushaho kugorana iyo bamaze kuba ingimbi n’abangavu. Baba bumva badashaka kuvuga ibyo batekereza n’uko biyumva. None se niba abana bawe ari uko bameze, wakora iki? Aho kugira ngo uhatire umuhungu wawe cyangwa umukobwa wawe kumarana nawe igihe kirekire muganira, ujye ushaka uburyo bwo kuganira na we mu buryo bufatiweho (Guteg 6:6, 7). Bishobora kuba ngombwa ko urushaho gushyiraho imihati kugira ngo mukorere ibintu hamwe. Mushobora kujyana gutembera cyangwa mukajyana mu modoka, mugakinira hamwe, cyangwa se mugakorana imirimo imwe n’imwe yo mu rugo. Ibyo bishobora gutuma bumva bisanzuye maze bakaba bavuga icyo batekereza.
5 Byagenda bite se umwana wawe akomeje kwanga ko muganira? Icyo gihe wagerageza ubundi buryo. Urugero, aho kugira ngo ubaze umukobwa wawe uko yiriwe, ushobora kumubwira uko wowe wiriwe. Ibyo bishobora gutuma na we akubwira uko yiriwe. Kugira ngo umenye icyo atekereza ku ngingo runaka, mubaze ibibazo nk’ibi bikurikira: “ese hari abo wigeze ubona bakora iki kintu?,” aho kumubaza uti “ese wigeze ukora iki kintu?” Ushobora kumubaza icyo incuti ze zitekereza kuri icyo kintu, hanyuma ukamubaza inama yaziha.
6. Ni iki cyakwemeza abana bawe ko uboneka kandi ko wishyikirwaho?
6 Birumvikana ko abana bawe bazakubwira uko babona ibintu niba babona ko uboneka kandi ko wishyikirwaho. Iyo abana babonye ko ababyeyi babo bahora bahuze ku buryo batabona umwanya wo kuganira na bo, bashobora kutababwira ibibazo byabo. Wagaragaza ute ko uri umuntu wishyikirwaho? Wakora ibirenze kubwira umwana wawe amagambo nk’aya ngo “ushobora kuza igihe icyo ari cyo cyose tukaganira.” Abana bawe b’ingimbi n’abangavu bakeneye kumva ko utazafatana uburemere buke ibibazo byabo cyangwa ngo ubarakarire. Ababyeyi benshi batanga urugero rwiza mu birebana n’ibyo. Uwitwa Kayla ufite imyaka cumi n’icyenda yagize ati “nshobora kubwira papa ikintu icyo ari cyo cyose. Ntajya anca mu ijambo kandi ntanshinja ibibi, ahubwo antega amatwi. Igihe cyose iyo tumaze kuganira ampa inama nziza.”
7. Umubyeyi yashyira mu gaciro ate igihe aganira n’abana be ibirebana no kurambagizanya kugira ngo atabarakaza?
7 Ndetse no mu gihe waba uganira n’abana bawe ku ngingo zitoroshye, urugero nko kurambagizanya, jya wirinda kubaha imiburo myinshi ngo wirengagize kubigisha uko bakwitwara neza muri icyo kibazo. Urugero: reka tuvuge ko ugiye muri resitora maze ukabona ku rupapuro rwerekana ibyokurya hariho gusa imiburo ivuga ko byose bihumanye. Ushobora kwigendera ukajya gushaka indi resitora. Abana bawe na bo bashobora kubigenza batyo niba baje kukugisha inama maze ukabaha imiburo gusa. (Soma mu Bakolosayi 3:21.) Aho kubigenza utyo, ujye ushyira mu gaciro. Hari mushiki wacu ukiri muto witwa Emily wagize ati “iyo ababyeyi banjye banganiriza ku birebana no kurambagizanya, ntibabivuga mu buryo bubi. Batsindagiriza ibyishimo umuntu agira iyo amenye undi neza n’ibyo aterwa no kubona uwo bazabana. Ibyo bituma ntatinya kuganira na bo kuri icyo kibazo. Mu by’ukuri, mba nifuza kubamenyesha ko mfite incuti y’umuhungu aho kubibahisha.”
8, 9. (a) Ni izihe nyungu ababyeyi babona iyo bateze abana babo amatwi batabaciye mu ijambo? (b) Gutega abana bawe amatwi byakugiriye akahe kamaro?
8 Mu buryo buhuje n’ibyo Kayla yavuze, ushobora kugaragaza ko wishyikirwaho utega abana bawe amatwi wihanganye. (Soma muri Yakobo 1:19.) Hari umugore urera abana wenyine witwa Katia wagize ati “kera sinihanganiraga umukobwa wanjye. Sinatumaga arangiza kuvuga. Hari igihe nabaga naniwe ku buryo ntashoboraga kumutega amatwi cyangwa ntashaka ko ambuza amahoro. Ubu narahindutse, kandi byatumye umukobwa wanjye na we ahinduka. Asigaye abangukirwa no kumbwira uko yiyumva.”
9 Umugabo witwa Ronald na we yagiranye ikibazo nk’icyo n’umukobwa we w’umwangavu. Yagize ati “igihe yambwiraga ko afite umuhungu bakundana ku ishuri, nabanje kumurakarira cyane. Ariko igihe natekerezaga ukuntu Yehova yihanganira abagaragu be kandi agashyira mu gaciro, nasanze ibyaba byiza ari uko nareka umukobwa wanjye akavuga icyo atekereza mbere yo kumukosora. Nishimira ko nabikoze. Ni bwo bwa mbere nari menye icyo umukobwa wanjye atekereza. Igihe yari arangije kuvuga, nashoboye kumuganiriza mu buryo bwuje urukundo. Natangajwe cyane nuko yemeye inama namugiriye. Yavuze ko yifuzaga rwose guhindura imyifatire ye.” Kuganira n’abana bawe kenshi bizagufasha kumenya ibyo batekereza n’uko biyumva. Ibyo bizatuma ugira uruhare mu myanzuro bafata. *
JYA UGABURIRA ABANA BAWE
10, 11. Wafasha ute abana bawe kugira ngo batareka ukuri?
10 Umwungeri mwiza aba azi ko buri ntama yose yo mu mukumbi we ishobora gutana. Wenda ishobora gukururwa n’ubwatsi ibonye hafi aho, ikagenda buhoro buhoro yitandukanya n’izindi, kugeza aho igiriye kure y’umukumbi. Mu buryo nk’ubwo, umwana ashobora kugenda buhoro buhoro areka ukuri, wenda akuruwe n’incuti mbi cyangwa imyidagaduro idakwiriye (Imig 13:20). Wakora iki kugira ngo ibyo bitaba?
11 Mu gihe wigisha abana bawe, jya uhita ugira icyo ukora mu gihe ubonye ko hari 2 Pet 1:5-8). Kugira gahunda y’iby’umwuka mu muryango ihoraho, ni bwo buryo bwiza cyane bwo kubikora. Umurimo Wacu w’Ubwami wo mu Kwakira 2008 wagize icyo ubivugaho ugira uti “abatware b’imiryango baraterwa inkunga yo gusohoza inshingano Yehova yabahaye yo gushyiraho gahunda ihoraho y’icyigisho cy’umuryango gifite ireme, kandi bagakora ibishoboka byose kugira ngo yubahirizwe.” Ese ukoresha neza icyo gihe kugira ngo ufashe abana bawe? Jya wiringira udashidikanya ko bishimira cyane imihati ushyiraho kugira ngo ubafashe mu buryo bw’umwuka.—Mat 5:3; Fili 1:10.
aho bafite intege nke. Jya ubafasha kugira ngo barusheho kugaragaza imico ya gikristo bafite (12. (a) Ni mu buhe buryo gahunda y’iby’umwuka mu muryango ihoraho yagiriye akamaro abakiri bato? (Shyiramo n’ibivugwa mu gasanduku gafite umutwe ugira uti “ Barayishimira.”) (b) Ni mu buhe buryo gahunda y’iby’umwuka mu muryango yakugiriye akamaro?
12 Reka turebe ibyo umukobwa w’umwangavu witwa Carissa yavuze ku birebana n’ukuntu gahunda y’iby’umwuka mu muryango yagiriye akamaro umuryango wabo. Yagize ati “nishimira ko twese twicara hamwe tukaganira. Bituma turushaho kunga ubumwe kandi tukabona ibintu byiza tuzahora twibuka. Buri gihe papa yubahiriza gahunda y’iby’umwuka mu muryango. Kuba ayifatana uburemere bintera inkunga, kandi bituma nanjye nyifatana uburemere. Ikindi kandi, bituma ndushaho kumwubaha kubera ko ari data kandi akaba afite inshingano yo kumfasha mu buryo bw’umwuka.” Mushiki wacu ukiri muto witwa Brittney yaravuze ati “gahunda y’iby’umwuka mu muryango yatumye ndushaho gushyikirana n’ababyeyi banjye. Inyereka ko bashaka kumva ibibazo byanjye kandi ko banyitaho. Idufasha kugira umuryango ukomeye kandi wunze ubumwe.” Uko bigaragara, kugaburira abana bawe mu buryo bw’umwuka, cyane cyane muri gahunda y’iby’umwuka mu muryango, ni bwo buryo bw’ibanze bwagufasha kuba umwungeri mwiza. *
JYA UYOBORA ABANA BAWE
13. Ni iki gishobora gutuma umwana yiyemeza gukorera Yehova?
13 Umwungeri mwiza akoresha inkoni kugira ngo ayobore umukumbi we kandi awurinde. Imwe mu ntego ze z’ibanze ni ukuyobora intama ze mu “rwuri rwiza” (Ezek 34:13, 14). Mubyeyi, ese ntufite intego yo mu buryo bw’umwuka nk’iyo? Wifuza kuyobora abana bawe kugira ngo bakorere Yehova. Wifuza ko bumva bameze nk’umwanditsi wa zaburi wanditse ati “Mana yanjye, nishimira gukora ibyo ushaka, kandi amategeko yawe ari mu mutima wanjye” (Zab 40:8). Abakiri bato babona ibintu batyo, bazegurira Yehova ubuzima bwabo kandi babatizwe. Birumvikana ko bagombye gutera iyo ntambwe ikomeye ari uko bamaze gusobanukirwa ibintu neza, kandi bakaba bafite icyifuzo cyo gukorera Yehova.
14, 15. (a) Ababyeyi b’Abakristo bagombye kugira iyihe ntego? (b) Ni iki gishobora gutuma umwana w’ingimbi cyangwa umwangavu ashidikanya ku nyigisho z’ukuri?
14 Byagenda bite se niba abana bawe batagaragaza amajyambere yo mu buryo bw’umwuka, ndetse wenda bakaba bashidikanya ku nyigisho z’ukuri? Jya wihatira gutoza abana bawe gukunda Yehova Imana no kumushimira ibyo yakoze byose (Ibyah 4:11). Igihe bazumva biteguye bazifatira umwanzuro wo kuyoboka Imana.
15 Hagati aho se, wakora iki mu gihe abana bawe batangiye gushidikanya? Wabafasha ute kubona ko gukorera Yehova ari bwo buryo bwiza bwo kubaho, kandi ko bizatuma bagira ibyishimo birambye? Gerageza kumenya impamvu zituma bashidikanya. Urugero, ese koko umuhungu wawe ntiyemera inyigisho za Bibiliya, cyangwa
ahubwo ananirwa kuzisobanurira bagenzi be bitewe no kutigirira icyizere? Ese koko umukobwa wawe ashidikanya ku kamaro ko gukurikiza amahame y’Imana, cyangwa ahubwo yumva ari mu bwigunge kandi akumva abandi baramuhaye akato?16, 17. Ababyeyi bafasha abana babo bate kugira ngo bihitiremo kugendera mu kuri?
16 Wafasha ute abana bawe kugira ngo bareke gushidikanya ku nyigisho z’ukuri? Ababyeyi benshi babonye ko uburyo bwiza bwo kumenya icyo umuhungu wabo cyangwa umukobwa wabo atekereza ari ukumubaza ibibazo nk’ibi bikurikira: “ese ubona ko kuba Umukristo byoroshye, cyangwa wumva bigoye? Wowe ku giti cyawe ubona bikumariye iki? Ni iki bigusaba kwigomwa? Ese ubona ko ibyo wigomwa ari bike ubigereranyije n’inyungu nyinshi ubona muri iki gihe, n’izo uzabona mu gihe kiri imbere?” Birumvikana ko wagombye kumubaza ibyo bibazo mu magambo yawe, ukabimubaza mu buryo bushishikaje kandi burangwa n’ineza, aho kumera nk’umuhata ibibazo. Mu gihe muganira, mushobora gusuzuma ibivugwa muri Mariko 10:29, 30. Hari abakiri bato bashobora guhitamo gukora imbonerahamwe y’inkingi ebyiri, imwe bakayandikamo icyo kuba Umukristo bibasaba kwigomwa, naho mu yindi bakandikamo akamaro kabyo. Ibyo bishobora kubafasha kumenya ibibazo bafite n’icyo bakora kugira ngo babikemure. Ese niba twigisha abashimishijwe igitabo Icyo Bibiliya yigisha, n’‘Urukundo rw’Imana,’ ntitwagombye no kubyigisha abana bacu? Ese urabikora?
17 Nyuma y’igihe, abana bawe bazihitiramo uwo bazakorera. Ntukibwire ko bazakorera Yehova bitewe gusa n’uko wahisemo kumukorera. Bagomba kwihitiramo kugendera mu kuri (Imig 3:1, 2). Niba ubona ko bisa n’aho byananiye umwana wawe, kuki utakongera gusuzumira hamwe na we inyigisho z’ibanze? Mufashe gutekereza ku bibazo nk’ibi bikurikira: “ni iki kinyemeza ko Imana ibaho? Ni iki kinyemeza ko Yehova Imana abona ko mfite agaciro? Kuki nemera ko amahame ya Yehova amfitiye akamaro?” Babyeyi, mujye mugaragaza ko muri abungeri beza kandi muyobore abana banyu mwihanganye. Mubafashe kwibonera ko gukorera Yehova ari bwo buryo bwiza bwo kubaho kurusha ubundi bwose. *—Rom 12:2.
18. Ababyeyi bakwigana bate Yehova, we Mwungeri Uhebuje?
18 Abakristo b’ukuri bose bifuza kwigana Umwungeri Uhebuje (Efe 5:1; 1 Pet 2:25). By’umwihariko, ababyeyi bagomba kumenya neza uko umukumbi wabo umeze, mbese bakamenya neza abana babo b’agaciro kenshi, kandi bagakora ibyo bashoboye byose kugira ngo babayobore bityo bazabone imigisha Yehova yabateganyirije. Ku bw’ibyo rero, mujye mukora uko mushoboye kose kugira ngo mube abungeri b’abana banyu mukomeza kubarerera mu kuri.
^ par. 9 Niba wifuza kumenya byinshi kurushaho, reba Umunara w’Umurinzi wo ku itariki ya 1 Kanama 2008, ku ipaji ya 10-12.
^ par. 12 Niba wifuza ibindi bitekerezo, reba ingingo ifite umutwe uvuga ngo “Icyigisho cy’umuryango ni ingenzi kugira ngo tuzarokoke,” mu Munara w’Umurinzi wo ku itariki ya 15 Ukwakira 2009, ku ipaji ya 29-31.
^ par. 17 Ibindi bisobanuro byatanzwe mu Munara w’Umurinzi wo ku itariki ya 1 Gashyantare 2012, ku ipaji ya 18-21.