Kodi ndizivala bwanji?
Zimene Achinyamata Amadzifunsa
Kodi ndizivala bwanji?
Heather wakonzeka kuti azipita koyenda, ndipo makolo ake atamuona mmene wavalira sakumvetsa.
Bambo ake akufunsa modabwa kuti, “Uvala zimenezo?”
Heather akuyankha mokhumudwa kuti, “Vuto n’chiyani? Sindikupita kutali, ndikungopita kumsika ndi anzanga.”
Mayi ake akuti, “Suchoka panyumba pano utavala zovala zimenezo.”
Heather akunena modandaula kuti, “Komatu amayi, anzanga onse amavala zovala zoterezi, . . ndipo zovalazi ndi zimene ineyo ndimakonda.”
Bambo ake akuyankha mokwiya kuti, “Koma ifeyo zovala zimenezo sitikuzifuna. Pita ukavale zovala zina pompano, apo ayi pakhomo pano suchoka.”
KUSIYANA maganizo pa nkhani ya zovala si kwachilendo. N’kutheka kuti makolo anunso ali achinyamata ankasemphana maganizo ndi makolo awo pa nkhani ya zovala. Ndipo mwina nthawi imeneyo nawonso ankamva ngati mmene mukumvera panopa. Koma panopa zinthu zasintha, iwowo ndi amene ayamba kulimbana nanu.
Inu mukanena kuti: Chovalachi chikundikhala.
Iwo akunena kuti: N’choonekera mkati.
Inu mukanena kuti: Chovalachi n’chokongola.
Iwo akunena kuti: N’chokopa anyamata.
Inu mukanena kuti: Chovalachi n’chotchipa.
Iwo akunena kuti: Chiyeneradi kutchipa chifukwa n’chachifupi.
Kodi zingatheke kuti musamasemphane maganizo ndi makolo anu pa nkhani ya zovala? Inde n’zotheka. Megan, yemwe ali ndi zaka 23, anafotokoza chimene chingathandize. Iye anati: “Si bwino kudana chifukwa cha zovala. N’zotheka kugwirizana ndi makolo anu pa nkhaniyi.” Kodi n’zothekadi kugwirizana? Kodi zikutanthauza kuti muzivala ngati munthu wazaka 40? Ayi. Koma zikutanthauza kuti mungakambirane ndi makolo anu kuti mupeze mtundu wa zovala zimene nonse mungasangalale nazo. Kodi ubwino wochita zimenezi ndi wotani?
1. Mungamaoneke bwino, ngakhale kwa anzanu.
2. Makolo anu sangamakudzudzuleni chifukwa cha zimene mwavala.
3. Makolo anu ataona kuti mumayesetsa kuvala bwino, angakupatseni mwayi woti muzichita zinthu zina panokha.
Ndiye tinene kuti mwapita kumsika ndipo mwaona chovala chimene chakusangalatsani kwambiri moti mukufunitsitsa kuchigula. Kodi muyenera kuganizira chiyani musanachigule?
Muziganizira Mfundo za M’Baibulo
N’zochititsa chidwi kuti Baibulo silinena zambiri pa nkhani ya zovala. Ndipo mukhoza kuwerenga zonse zimene Baibulo limanena pa nkhani imeneyi m’mphindi zochepa chabe. Komabe zimene mungawerenge pa nthawi yochepayi n’zothandiza kwambiri. Mwachitsanzo:
▪ Baibulo limalangiza akazi kuti azidzikongoletsa mwa kuvala “moyenera, mwaulemu ndi mwanzeru.” *—1 Timoteyo 2:9, 10.
Mwina mawu akuti “mwaulemu” angakudetseni nkhawa, n’kumadzifunsa kuti, ‘Kodi ndizichita kuvala nsanza?’ Ayi. Pa nkhani ya zovala, mawu akuti “mwaulemu” akutanthauza kuti muzivala modzilemekeza komanso moganizira ena. (2 Akorinto 6:3) Pali zovala zambiri zomwe mutavala, anthu angamaone kuti mumadzilemekeza. Mtsikana wina wazaka 23, dzina lake Danielle, anati: “Kuchita zimenezi n’kovuta, komabe n’zotheka kuoneka bwino popanda kuvala motayirira.”
▪ Pa nkhani ya maonekedwe, Baibulo limalimbikitsa kuganizira kwambiri za “munthu wa mkati.”—1 Petulo 3:4.
Kuvala motayirira kungachititse kuti ena akopeke nanu, koma dziwani kuti “munthu wa mkati,” kapena kuti makhalidwe abwino, ndi amene angachititse kuti anthu achikulire komanso anzanu azikulemekezani. Kodi n’zothekadi kuti anzanu azikulemekezani? Inde, chifukwa nawonso angaone kuti kuvala motayirira n’kupanda nzeru. Brittany, yemwe ali ndi zaka 16, anati: “Zimakhumudwitsa kwambiri kuona akazi akudzigulitsa kwa amuna povala motayirira.” Mtsikana wina dzina lake Kay anavomereza zimenezi. Ponena za mtsikana wina yemwe anali mnzake, iye anati: “Chilichonse chimene ankavala chinali chokopa anyamata. Iye ankafuna kuti anyamata azimugomera,
ndipo kuti zimenezi zitheke ankayesetsa kuvala zovala zokopa kwambiri.”Mfundo Yofunika Kukumbukira: Muzipewa kuvala zovala zochititsa anthu kuganiza za chiwerewere. Zovala zotere zingachititse kuti anthu aziona ngati simuganizira ena kapena mukufunafuna amuna. Kuvala motayirira kungachititsenso kuti ena azikuvutitsani kapena kukuchitani zachipongwe. Koma ngati mwavala modzilemekeza, mumaoneka bwino ndiponso mumadziwika kuti muli ndi makhalidwe abwino.
Muzimvera Malangizo a Makolo Anu
Si nzeru kubisa chovala chosayenera m’chikwama n’kukavala mutafika kusukulu. Kuti makolo anu azikudalirani, ndi bwino kuti muzichita zinthu mokhulupirika, ngakhale pamene makolo anuwo sangakuoneni. Ndipo mungachite bwino kumafunsa maganizo awo mukafuna kugula chovala.—Miyambo 15:22.
Mwina mungaganize kuti chilichonse chimene mungawafunse angakuletseni, koma si zoona. N’zothekadi kuti mayi ndi bambo anu aziona zinthu mosiyana ndi mmene inuyo mukuzionera. Koma zimenezi n’zothandizanso kwa inuyo. Mtsikana wina wazaka 17, dzina lake Nataleine, anati: “Ndimayamikira malangizo a makolo anga chifukwa sindifuna kuchoka pakhomo nditavala zovala zochititsa manyazi kapena zimene zingachititse kuti anthu azindinyoza.”
Ndiponso dziwani mfundo iyi: Malinga ngati mudakali pakhomo pa makolo anu, iwo ali ndi udindo wokuuzani zochita. (Akolose 3:20) Komanso simungamayambane pankhani ya zovala ngati inuyo mumadziwa zimene iwo amafuna ndiponso ngati iwo amadziwa zimene inuyo mumafuna.
Mfundo Yofunika Kukumbukira: Mukamayesa chovala, muziganizira zinthu zingapo. Mwachitsanzo, chovala chimene mukuona kuti n’chabwino, chingapezeke kuti si chabwino kwenikweni mukakhala pansi kapena mukawerama. Choncho ngati n’kotheka, ndi bwino kufunsa makolo anu kapena munthu wina wachikulire kuti akuthandize kusankha moyenera.
Nkhani zina zakuti “Zimene Achinyamata Amafunsa,“ mungazipeze pa adiresi yathu ya pa Intaneti ya www.jw.org.
[Mawu a M’munsi]
^ ndime 23 Ngakhale kuti malangizowa akupita kwa akazi, mfundo yake ikukhudzanso amuna. Onani bokosi lakuti, “Nanga Bwanji Anyamata?”
ZOTI MUGANIZIRE
Ganizirani chovala chimene mukufuna kugula. Ndiyeno dzifunseni kuti:
▪ Kodi anthu akandiona nditavala chovala chimenechi azindiganizira zotani?
▪ Kodi anthu ena angandichitire chiyani atandiona nditavala chovala chimenechi?
▪ Kodi ndingasangalale zinthu zimenezi zitandichitikira?
[Bokosi/Zithunzi patsamba 19]
Mmene Mungasankhire Zovala
Malangizo: Koperani zimene zili patsambali. Pemphani makolo anu kuti ayankhe mafunso amene ali kumanja ndipo inuyo muyankhe mafunso amene ali kumanzere. Kenako sinthanani mapepala anuwo ndi kukambirana zimene mwayankha. Kodi mayankho ena akudabwitsani? Kodi n’chiyani chachilendo chimene mwaphunzira kuchokera pa zimene nonse mwayankha?
MBALI YANU MBALI YA MAKOLO
Ganizirani chovala chimene Ganizirani chovala chimene
mukufuna kuvala kapena kugula. mwana wanu akufuna kuvala
kapena kugula.
▪ Kodi n’chifukwa chiyani ▪ Kodi mukuganiza kuti mwana
mwachikonda chovalacho? Pa wanu akuchikonda chovalacho
zinthu zimene zili m’munsizi, chifukwa chiyani? Pa zinthu
lembani manambala kuyambira pa zimene zili m’munsizi, lembani
chifukwa chachikulu chimene manambala kuyambira pachifukwa
chakupangitsani kuti chachikulu chimene mukuganiza
muchikonde kwambiri kuti chikuchititsa mwana wanu
chovalacho. kukonda chovalacho.
․․․․․ Dzina la chovalacho ․․․․․ Dzina la chovalacho
․․․․․ N’chokopa amuna ․․․․․ N’chokopa amuna
․․․․․ Anzanga ambiri ․․․․․ Anzake ambiri
angachikonde angachikonde.
․․․․․N’chondikwana bwino ․․․․․ N’chomukwana bwino.
․․․․․ Mtengo wake ․․․․․ Mtengo wake.
․․․․․ Chifukwa china ․․․․․ Chifukwa china
▪ Makolo anga akangochiona, Zimene ndinganene
anganene kuti nditangochiona
□ “Si chabwino □ “Si chabwino
ngakhale pang’ono.” ngakhale pang’ono.”
□ “Si chabwino kwenikweni.” □ “Si chabwino kwenikweni.”
□ “N’chabwino.” □ “N’chabwino.”
▪ Iwo anganene kuti Sindingachivomereze
sanachikonde chovalacho chifukwa
chifukwa
□ “N’chokopa amuna.” □ “N’chokopa amuna.”
□ “N’chothina.” □ “N’chothina.”
□ “N’cha fasho kwambiri.” □ “N’cha fasho kwambiri.”
□ “N’chochititsa manyazi “N’chochititsa manyazi
makolo akofe.” makolo akofe.”
□ “N’chokwera mtengo □ “N’chokwera mtengo
kwambiri.” kwambiri.”
□ Chifukwa china ․․․․․ □ Chifukwa china ․․․․․
BWANJI TICHITIRE LIMODZI IZI?
▪ Kodi zimene makolo anga ▪ Kodi chovalacho
akunena n’zothandiza bwanji? sitikuchikonda chifukwa chakuti
tikukakamira maganizo athu?
․․․․․ □ Inde □ Mwina □ Ayi
▪ Kodi chovalacho ▪ Kodi tingachisoke bwanji
chingasokedwenso kuti chovalacho kuti chikhale
chikhale bwino? bwino, ngati zili zotheka?
․․․․․ ․․․․․
MWASANKHA ZOTANI?
․․․․․
[Bokosi/Zithunzi patsamba 20]
ZIMENE ANZANU AMANENA
“Palibe vuto kuvala chovala chamtundu winawake malinga ngati sichikusemphana ndi mfundo za m’Baibulo. Pali zinthu zambiri zimene mungagule zooneka bwino ndiponso zosakaikitsa.”—Derrick.
“Ndisanakwanitse zaka 20, ndinkafunitsitsa nditakhala ndi ufulu wochita zinthu pandekha. Sindinkafuna kuti munthu wina azindisankhira zovala. Koma m’kupita kwa nthawi ndinazindikira kuti sankandipatsa ufulu umene ndinkafuna mpaka pamene ndinayamba kumvera maganizo a makolo anga ndi anthu ena achikulire.”—Megan.
“Ndikaona atsikana atavala motayirira, ndimasiya kuwalemekeza. Koma ndikaona atsikana atavala modzilemekeza, ndimadziuza kuti, ‘Ndimafuna kuti nanenso ndizioneka choncho.’”—Nataleine.
[Bokosi/Chithunzi patsamba 21]
NANGA BWANJI ANYAMATA?
Mfundo za m’Baibulo zimene takambirana m’nkhaniyi zikukhudzanso anyamata. Nanunso muyenera kuvala mwaulemu. Zovala zanu zizisonyeza kuti ndinu munthu wamakhalidwe abwino. Mukafuna kugula chovala, muzidzifunsa kuti: ‘Kodi anthu azindiona bwanji? Kodi mmene azindionera ndi mmene ndililidi?’ Kumbukirani kuti zovala zimasonyeza khalidwe lanu. Muzionetsetsa kuti zovala zanu zikugwirizana ndi zimene mumakhulupirira.
[Bokosi patsamba 21]
UTHENGA KWA MAKOLO
Taganizirani chitsanzo chimene chili kumayambiriro kwa nkhaniyi, ndipo yerekezerani kuti Heather ndi mwana wanu. Mungaone kuti sanavale bwino, ndipo n’kutheka mungamuuze kuti, “Pita ukavule zovala zimenezo, apo ayi suchoka pakhomo pano.” Mwina kuchita zimenezi kungathandize, chifukwa mwana wanuyo sangachitire mwina koma kuvula zovalazo. Komabe zimenezi sizingathandize kuti asinthe maganizo ake n’kuyamba kusankha yekha zovala zoyenera.
▪ Choyamba, dziwani kuti mwana wanuyo ndi amene ayenera kuzindikira kuipa kovala mosayenera kuposa inuyo. Pansi pa mtima, iye sangakonde kuoneka wopusa komanso wokopa amuna kapena akazi. Choncho, ndi bwino kumuuza kuti zovalazo zikum’chititsa kuti asaoneke bwino. * Kenako muuzeni zimene angachite kuti aoneke bwino.
▪ Chachiwiri, lolani kuti “kulolera kwanu kudziwike.” (Afilipi 4:5) Dzifunseni kuti, ‘Kodi chovalachi chikutsutsana ndi mfundo za m’Baibulo, kapena zangokhala kuti ineyo sindinachikonde?’ (2 Akorinto 1:24) Ngati sichikutsutsana ndi mfundo iliyonse ya m’Baibulo, mwina mungalole mwana wanu kuvala chovalacho?
▪ Chachitatu, m’malo mongouza mwana wanu zinthu zimene sayenera kuvala, muthandizeni kusankha zovala zabwino. Muthandizeni kuti azivala zovala zoyenerera. Zimenezi n’zofunika kwambiri.
[Mawu a M’munsi]
^ ndime 82 Ana ambiri amada nkhawa ndi mmene amaonekera, choncho pomulangiza mwana wanu pankhani ya zovala, samalani kuti asaganize kuti saoneka bwino.