MAZANO EKUBATSIRA MHURI | KURERA VANA
Kurambana Kunokanganisa Sei Vana?
Vamwe vabereki pavanotadza kuwirirana vanofunga kuti zvitori nani kuti varambane pane kuti vana vavo vagare nevabereki vasinganyatsopindirani. Chokwadi ndechipi?
Kurambana kunokanganisa sei vana?
Nyanzvi dzinotaura kuti kurambana kunokanganisa vana zvisingaiti. Vana vane vabereki vakarambana vanowanzoita zvinhu zvinotevera:
hasha, kushungurudzika, nekuora mwoyo
vanonetsana nevamwe
vanofoira chikoro kana kuchisiyira panzira
havatani kurwara
Uyezve vana vakawanda vanozvipa mhosva yekurambana kwevabereki, vachifunga kuti ndivo vakazvikonzera. Vanogona kunetseka kuti dai paine zvavakaitawo kuti vabatsire vabereki vavo kuti vasarambana.
Matambudziko anosangana nevana vane vabereki vakarambana anogona kuramba aripo kunyange pavanokura. Anoita kuti vazvitarisire pasi uye vatadze kuvimba nevamwe. Kana vakazovawo nematambudziko mudzimba dzavo vanogona kuzorambanawo sezvakaitwa nevabereki vavo.
Pfungwa inokosha ndeiyi: Kunyange zvazvo vamwe vanhu vachifunga kuti kurambana kuchabatsira vana vavo, ongororo dzakaitwa dzinoratidza kuti mafungiro aya haasi echokwadi. Imwe nyanzvi inoona nezvekurera vana inonzi Penelope Leach yakanyora kuti: “Kurambana kunoita kuti vana vashungurudzike.” a
Zvinotaurwa neBhaibheri: ‘Musangofunga zvakakunakirai chete, asi zvakanakirawo vamwe.’—VaFiripi 2:4.
Mwana wangu achawedzera kufara here kana tikarambana?
Vamwe vangati hungu. Musakanganwa kuti kazhinji zvinodiwa nemubereki nezvinodiwa nemwana zvakasiyana. Vabereki pavanenge vachifunga zvekurambana, vanenge vachida upenyu hutsva asi kazhinji mwana anenge achida kuramba aine upenyu hwaanahwo nababa naamai vake.
Pashure pekuongorora zviuru zvevanhu vakarambana, vanyori vebhuku rinonzi The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce vakanyora kuti: “Chokwadi ndeichi: vana vacho havatauri kuti vakawedzera kufara, asi vanototaura kuti, ‘Zuva rakarambana vabereki vangu upenyu hwangu hwakabva hwachinja.’” Bhuku racho rinowedzera kuti “kuona vanhu vavaivimba navo vasisawirirani kunoita kuti vararame upenyu hwekungotyira kuti pane chakaipa chinogona kuitika kwavari.”
Pfungwa inokosha ndeiyi: Vana havafari kana vabereki vavo varambana.
Zvinotaurwa neBhaibheri: “Kusuruvara kunopedza simba remunhu.”—Zvirevo 17:22.
Zvii zvandinofanira kuziva nezvekurera vana tiri kwake kwake?
Vamwe vabereki vanenge varambana vanofunga kuti vanogona kubatsirana kurera vana kunyange vachigara mumwe kwake mumwe kwake. Asi izvi hazvisi nyore. Ongororo dzakaitwa dzinoratidza kuti vanhu vakarambana kazhinji:
vanopedza nguva shoma nevana vavo
mitemo yavanopa vana inenge isina kufanana
vanorega mwana achiita zvaanoda vachida kumufadza
Mwana ane vabereki vakarambana anowanzoramba kuteerera achipa chikonzero chekuti vabereki vake havanawo kuramba vakavimbika uye kuzadzisa mhiko dzemuchato. Anogona kufunga kuti: ‘Saka nei ndichifanira kuvateera?’
Pfungwa inokosha ndeiyi: Kurera vana muri kwake kwake kwakaoma. Asi vana ndivo vanotonyanya kuomerwa.
Zvinotaurwa neBhaibheri: “Musatsamwisa vana venyu, kuti varege kuora mwoyo.”—VaKorose 3:21, mashoko emuzasi.
Pane zvingaitwa here panzvimbo pekurambana?
Ibasa chairo kutanga upenyu hutsva. Zvitori nani kushandisa nguva nesimba pakugadzirisa matambudziko enyu kuti murambe muri mese. Bhuku rinonzi The Case for Marriage rinoti: “Kana vanhu vaine matambudziko muwanano yavo hazvirevi kuti acharamba angoripo kweupenyu hwese. Nekufamba kwenguva, vanhu vanga vasingafari muwanana dzavo asi voramba vari pamwe chete vanozotangazve kufara.” Tichifunga zvese izvi, kuti vana vanyatsokura zvakanaka zvinoda kuti vabereki vavo varambe vari pamwe chete.
Izvi hazvirevi kuti vanhu havatombofaniri kurambana. Bhaibheri rinobvumira kurambana kana paitwa upombwe. (Mateu 19:9) Asi rinotiwo “munhu ane njere anofungisisa nhanho imwe neimwe.” (Zvirevo 14:15) Vanhu vanenge vachifunga kurambana vanofanira kutanga vanyatsofunga matambudziko anogona kuzovapo kusanganisira kukanganisa kwazvinoita vana.
Asi pane zvimwewo zvaunofanira kuita kunze kwekungoshingirira. Bhaibheri rinopa mazano akanaka anobatsira varume nevakadzi kuva neunhu hunodiwa kuti vave newanano yakasimba uye inofadza. Mazano acho anoshanda nekuti munyori weBhaibheri, Jehovha, ndiye akatanga wanano.—Mateu 19:4-6.
Zvinotaurwa neBhaibheri: “Ini, Jehovha, ndini Mwari wako, iye anokudzidzisa zvinokubatsira.”—Isaya 48:17.
a Kubva mubhuku rinonzi Your Growing Child—From Babyhood Through Adolescence.