Zimene Achinyamata Amadzifunsa

N’chifukwa Chiyani Anthu Amakonda Kundifananitsa ndi Ena?

“Zimandipweteka kwambiri makolo anga kapena aphunzitsa anga akamandifananitsa ndi anthu ena.”—Anatero Mia. *

“Anthu akamandifananitsa ndi ena, amangowonjezera vuto limene ndili nalo kale lofuna kukhala ngati anthu amene akundifananitsa nawowo.”—Anatero April.

APHUNZITSI anu kusukulu angakudzudzuleni chifukwa choti simukhoza bwino masamu ngati mmene amakhozera mnzanu m’kalasi mwanu. Kunyumba, mayi anu kapena bambo anu angakukalipireni chifukwa choti siinu waudongo ngati mmene mlongo wanu alili. Munthu wina anganene kuti, “Amayi ako anali okongola kwambiri pamene anali msinkhu wakowu!” Mawu amenewa angakhale opweteka kwambiri chifukwa angakupatseni maganizo oti munthuyo sakuona kuti ndinu wokongola. Mumtima mwanu mungamve ngati mungolankhula mwaukali kuti, “Kodi n’chifukwa chiyani anthu amakonda kundifananitsa ndi winawake?”

Kodi n’chifukwa chiyani kufananitsidwa ndi anthu ena kumapweteka kwambiri? Kodi munthu angapindulepo chilichonse? Kodi mungachite chiyani anthu akamakufananitsani ndi ena?

N’chifukwa Chiyani Kufananitsidwa ndi Anthu Ena Kumapweteka?

Chifukwa chimodzi n’chakuti zimene anthu amanena nthawi zina, n’zimenenso inu mumazidandaula kale. Mwachitsanzo, mtsikana wina dzina lake Becky anati, “Kusukulu ndikaona ana anzanga amene amakondedwa ndi anthu ambiri ndimawasirira, ndipo mumtima mwanga ndimati, ‘Ndikanakhala ngati iwowo, bwenzi inenso anthu ambiri akundikonda.’”

Kodi n’chiyani chimachititsa kudzikayikira kumeneku? Taganizirani zimene zikuchitika m’thupi lanu ndi m’maganizo mwanu. N’kutheka kuti thupi lanu likusintha mofulumira. Mwina zikumakhala zokuvutani kugwirizana ndi makolo anu. Mwinanso mmene mukuonera anyamata kapena atsikana panopo n’zosiyana kwambiri ndi m’mbuyomu. Ndiye mwina mukudabwa kuti, ‘Kodi ineyo ndikukula bwinobwino?’

Mwina mukuona kuti njira yodziwira ngati mukukula bwinobwino ndiyo kudzifananitsa ndi achinyamata ena amenenso ali ndi vuto lofananalo. Maganizo amenewa angakhale ngati msampha umene mungakolemo. Chifukwa chake n’chakuti, ngati achinyamata enawo akuoneka kuti sakuvutika ngati mmene inu mukuvutikira, zimawonjezera nkhawa yanu. Ndiyeno munthu wina wachikulire akakufunsani kuti, ‘Bwanji suli ngati uje?’ mungaone ngati zimene mumadzikayikira zija, zakuti simukukula bwinobwino, n’zoona.

 Mtsikana wina dzina lake April anatchula chifukwa chinanso chimene chimachititsa kuti kufananitsidwa ndi anthu ena kukhale kopweteka. Iye anati: “Anthu akakufananitsa ndi munthu wina, makamaka munthu amene ndi mzako kapena m’bale wako, zingachititse kuti uyambe kum’chitira nsanje kapena kuipidwa naye.” Mia, yemwenso ndi mtsikana, akudziwa bwino mmene zimenezo zimapwetekera. Makolo ake ndiponso aphunzitsi ake amakonda kum’fananitsa ndi mkulu wake. Iye anati: “Amandiuza zabwino zonse zimene mkulu wangayo anachita pamene anali msinkhu wanga.” Kodi Mia amamva bwanji ndi zimenezi? Iye anafotokoza kuti: “Ndimamva ngati ndili pampikisano ndi mkulu wangayo. Ndipo nthawi zina ndimaipidwa naye.”

N’zoonadi, kufananitsa anthu kungakhale ndi zotsatirapo zoipa. Taonani zimene zinachitikira anzake apamtima kwambiri a Yesu. Usiku womaliza Yesu asanafe, atumwi ake ‘anakangana koopsa.’ N’chifukwa chiyani? Ankadzifananitsa wina ndi mzake n’kumakangana kuti ndani pakati pawo “amene amaoneka wamkulu koposa.” (Luka 22:24) Apatu n’zoonekeratu kuti kufananitsa kwina kungakhale koopsa. Koma kodi kufananitsa anthu kulikonse n’koipa?

Kufananitsa Anthu Kwabwino

Taganizirani za Danieli ali mnyamata, ndi anzake atatu achiheberi, omwe akusimbidwa m’Baibulo. Anyamata amenewa anakana kudya chakudya chapamwamba choperekedwa ndi mfumu ya ku Babulo, chomwe chinali choletsedwa m’malamulo a Mulungu. (Levitiko 11:4-8) Pofuna kuthandiza wowayang’anira kuti akhulupirire za chakudya chowayenerera, Danieli anapempha kuti awayese. Iye anapempha kuti pakatha masiku khumi iwo akudya chakudya chovomerezeka m’malamulo a Mulungu, woyang’anirayo adzafananitse anyamata achiheberiwo ndi anyamata ena amene anali nawo ku nyumba kwa mfumuko. Kodi zotsatirapo zake zinali zotani?

Baibulo limati: “Atatha masiku khumiwo tsono, anaona kuti maonekedwe [a Aheberiwo] ndi kunenepa kwawo anaposa anyamata onse adadyawo zakudya za mfumu.” (Danieli 1:6-16) Taonani kuti zotsatirapo zabwinozi sizinachitike chifukwa chakuti Danieli ndi anzakewo anali oposa anzawowo mwachibadwa ayi. Koma kwenikweni chinali chifukwa chakuti anyamata achiheberiwo anamvera malamulo amene Mulungu anapatsa anthu ake.

Kodi n’kutheka kuti zimene zikukuchitikirani zikufanana ndi zimene zinachitikira anyamata achiheberiwa? Ngati muli ndi makhalidwe abwino amene Baibulo limalimbikitsa, mosakayikira mumasiyana ndi achinyamata ena. Anthu ena amene amaona kusiyana kumeneku angadabwe n’kuyamba ‘kukunyozani.’ (1 Petulo 4:3, 4) Koma ena amaona makhalidwe anu abwinowo, ndipo mwina angalimbikitsidwe kuphunzira za Yehova. (1 Petulo 2:12) Pa zinthu zoterezi, kufananitsidwa ndi anthu ena kungakhale kwabwino.

Kufananitsa anthu kungakhale kothandiza m’njira inanso. Mwachitsanzo, mwina inu mukuona kuti mumagwira ntchito zambiri ndithu pakhomo, poyerekeza ndi m’bale wanu. Koma mwina makolo anu sakuona choncho. Pofuna kukuthandizani maganizo, iwo mwina angagwiritse ntchito chitsanzo cha m’Baibulo ndi kukupemphani kuti mufananitse maganizo anu ndiponso zochita zanu ndi za munthu wina wotchulidwa m’Baibulo.

Mwachitsanzo, mwina angakukumbutseni kuti ngakhale kuti Yesu ankatchedwa Ambuye ndi Mphunzitsi, iye anasambitsa mapazi a ophunzira ake. (Yohane 13:12-15) Kenako, mwina angakulimbikitseni kuti mutsanzire kudzichepetsa kwa Yesu ndiponso mtima wake wogwira ntchito mwakhama. Ndipotu Baibulo limalimbikitsa Akhristu onse, ana ndi akulu omwe, kuti nthawi zonse azidziyerekezera ndi Khristu n’kumayesa ‘kutsatira mapazi ake mosamalitsa.’ (1 Petulo 2:21) Kudzifananitsa kotereku kumatithandiza kukhala odzichepetsa nthawi zonse, ndiponso kumatithandiza kukhala ndi makhalidwe amene Yehova amasangalala nawo.

Zimene Mungachite Akakufananitsani ndi Ena Mosayenerera

N’zoona kuti zingakhale zokhumudwitsa akakufananitsani mosayenerera ndi m’bale wanu kapena  mnzanu. Kodi mungachite chiyani? Mfumu yanzeru Solomo inati: “Kulingalira kwa munthu kuchedwetsa mkwiyo.” (Miyambo 19:11) Kodi kulingalira kungakuthandizeni bwanji? N’kutheka kuti munthu amene akukufananitsaniyo, kaya ndi mayi anu kapena bambo anu kapenanso mphunzitsi wanu, akukufunirani zabwino. Koma mwina inu simungaganize choncho. Cathy anati: “Munthu wina akandifananitsa ndi ena, ndimadzifunsa kuti, ‘Kodi akufuna kundithandiza chiyani?’” Cathy anaona kuti kuganizira mmene angapindulire akamam’fananitsa ndi wina, nthawi zambiri kumam’thandiza kuti asakhumudwe.

Komano bwanji ngati mukuona kuti anthu amakonda kukufananitsani ndi ena? Mwachitsanzo, mwina mayi anu kapena bambo anu amakonda kumakufananitsani mosayenerera ndi mkulu wanu kapena mng’ono wanu. Mungachite bwino kulankhula ndi mayi anu kapena bambo anuwo, n’kuwafotokozera mwaulemu mmene mumamvera akamakufananitsani ndi munthu wina. N’kutheka kuti mayi kapena bambo anuwo sakudziwa kuti mumakhumudwa nazo.

Komabe kumbukirani kuti pali “mphindi yakulankhula” ndiponso “mphindi yakutonthola.” (Mlaliki 3:7) Ulendo wina akadzakufananitsani ndi munthu wina, m’malo molankhula mokalipa, dzadikireni mpaka mtima utakhala m’malo, kenako dzalankhuleni mofatsa ndi mayi kapena bambo anuwo kapena munthu yemwe anakufananitsani mosayenererayo. Mukadzatero, zonena zanuzo zidzakhala zogwira mtima.—Miyambo 16:23.

Nthawi zambiri kudziwa mbali zimene mumachita bwino kungakuthandizeni kuti musamakhumudwe kwambiri. Mtumwi Paulo anauza Timoteyo kuti: “Usalole kuti munthu aliyense akuderere poona kuti ndiwe mnyamata.” (1 Timoteyo 4:12) Timoteyo anaikidwa kukhala woyang’anira wachikhristu ali wachinyamata. Choncho n’kutheka kuti anthu ena ankamufananitsa ndi amuna ena achikulire odziwa zinthu zambiri. Koma kufananitsa anthu koteroko kunali kosayenera. Ngakhale kuti Timoteyo anali wachinyamata, iye anali ataphunzira zinthu zambiri pamene anali kuyenda ndi Paulo. Timoteyo ankadziwa kugwiritsa ntchito Mawu a Mulungu mogwira mtima. Ndipo ankasamaliradi abale ndi alongo ake auzimu.—1 Akorinto 4:17; Afilipi 2:19, 20.

Motero, anthu akadzakufananitsani mosayenera ulendo wina, dzadzifunseni kuti, ‘Kodi zimene akundinenazi n’zoona?’ Ngati zili zoona, dzayeseni kuphunzirapo kenakake. Koma ngati kuli kungokokomeza zinthu—monga kunena kuti, “Bwanji osakhala ngati m’bale wakoyu?”—dzayeseni kuonapo mbali imene ingakupindulitseni pa zimene akunenazo.

Pofuna kuona kuti ndinu wofunika motani, Yehova Mulungu sakufananitsani ndi munthu wina wopanda ungwiro. (Agalatiya 6:4) Iye samangoona mmene mumaonekera ayi, koma amamvetsanso zimene zili mumtima mwanu. (1 Samueli 16:7) Indedi, Yehova amaona kuti mukuyesetsa kukhala munthu wotani. (Aheberi 4:12, 13) Iye sayembekezera kuti muzichita bwino pa chilichonse, ndipo amayang’ana mbali zimene mumachita bwino. (Salmo 130:3, 4) Kudziwa mfundo zimenezi kungakuthandizeni kuti musamakhumudwe kwambiri pamene anthu akufananitsani ndi ena.

Nkhani zina zakuti “Zimene Achinyamata Amafunsa,“ mungazipeze pa adiresi yathu ya pa Intaneti ya www.jw.org.

[Mawu a M’munsi]

ZOTI MUGANIZIRE

▪ Kodi n’kukufananitsani kotani kumene mumakhumudwa nako?

▪ Ngati makolo anu amakonda kukufananitsani ndi ena, kodi mungatani?

[Mawu Otsindika patsamba 12]

“Sindingasangalale nazo kuti munthu amene akundipatsa malangizo azitchula dzina la munthu wina n’kunena kuti, ‘Uzichita ngati uje.’ Koma, aziyamba wandithokoza pa mbali zimene ndimachita bwino, kenako andithandize mwachikondi kuona zolephera zanga.”—Anatero Natalie

[Chithunzi patsamba 13]

Mungachite bwino kuwafotokozera mwaulemu mmene mumamvera akamakufananitsani ndi munthu wina